Moodiness

Sometimes I feel like I am a teenager again with my pregnancy mood swings. Unfortunately though it feels like they are usually the negative emotions with not a lot of "up" moods. So I guess instead of a swing that goes up and down it would be one that swings side to side between a range of negative emotions. I'm sure I'm not the only pregnant woman to feel like I only have the crappy effects of pregnancy without the good ones, but sometimes that's how it seems. Why can't hormones affect you in a positive way? It's not all bad, don't get me wrong. The second trimester has been better than the first in terms of how I feel, I'm not quite as tired, and not usually sick (no morning sickness anyway), as long as I stay away from smelly people and cigarette smoke, those have been terrible. So those problems are minor, although there are still some days where I just want to crash for the whole afternoon or I get a little queasy. Overall though it's mostly just moodiness, which is affected by my stress level since I am crazy busy with school and work and starting to apply for jobs.

Don't get me wrong, I like being pregnant, I love knowing that in 5 months I'm going to be a mom and Eric will be a dad. It's hard to make it real sometimes though when all I feel is cranky or tired or emotional and I'm still not showing very much and the baby just started moving recently so I don't feel it that often. It's more abstract right now. Once the baby starts moving a lot and I can feel it more, and when we get to see it on the ultrasound and see that it actually looks human (rather than a peanut, which is how the first ultrasound looked), and find out if it's a boy or a girl, then I think it will be more real. I'm looking forward to that, and so is Eric. Only a few more weeks, April 12th. It seems like a really long time because we thought we would find out earlier than we actually get to, plus people ask us about it all the time. That is the next big thing to happen in the pregnancy. Well, that and getting fatter. I'm actually looking forward to getting more of a stomach, it feels so unreal and I think having a bigger belly will make it more realistic and exciting. Only a pregnant woman would be this excited to gain weight! So, negative parts aside (and they are relatively minor afterall), there is a lot of amazing things going on, with the baby moving occasionally, and there is a lot to look forward to in the coming weeks. No matter what I say or if I complain, I am really excited to be pregnant and looking forward to being a parent!