10 days?

I'm really surprised that it's been 10 days since I last wrote. Not really actually. I've been super busy. Eric and I have both started working, I volunteered at my mom's retreat this past weekend, and I've been researching like crazy. Have you ever read 10 books in 2 weeks? Not to mention multiple articles, a couple of encyclicals, some Catholic encyclopedias, eventually the Catechism, and all the time that goes into trying to find decent articles and books. I probably have looked at way more than 10 books, and I still have a couple to go, but so far I've read close to 10 and of those, 7 have been helpful. That's just books. Plus the other stuff I already mentioned. I'm hoping from the last 4 books that I have yet to read at least 2 of them will be useful. It's crazy-I think I have enough research, but at the same time, I want to make sure I not only have enough but that I have a deep knowledge of what I'm researching, so instead of just reviewing my research notes I find that it's probably good that I just keep reading. I'm definitely going to be slowing down though-I hope to have all, or if not all close to all, of my research done by the end of the weekend. Oh, and this is just for my honors project by the way. If I look for anything else, it'll be articles, not books. I'm not sure if I will though. Once my I write out my survey, it basically means that all my research is done. I can't write my survey without my research, but I need to get my survey out soon, so I'm writing it tomorrow. Which means my research is basically done and anything else I do is supplemental, either to add a bit more to my final paper or just for my own knowledge. The point is, I've been researching like crazy. I feel very scholarly actually. And a lot of what I'm reading is from really well-known and well-respected theologians. It's really a great experience. My friend asked me today if this is something I think I would want to do, this kind of research. I'm not sure yet-it is incredibly interesting and fun, apart from the hard work part, and although a lot of what I'm learning isn't super new, a lot of it is. I'm getting a very good background into Catholic morality, not just sexual morality but general, and into sexuality, not just sexual ethics. Plus, apparantly part of my project is basically brand new, no one has done anything quite like it before, so it's really flattering to hear my committee, who are all professors with doctorates, compliment me on the depth and direction of my project. I had never heard anything about something like this before, but I guess I didn't really think that I would create something original. It's a really good feeling. My committee is talking, just a little right now, about publishing my project. Whoa. Just thinking about it is scary. I'm doing real, scholarly work, like an actual theologian. I almost feel like an adult now.

Actually, that does remind me of something else that I've been experiencing a lot in my classes this year. I'm not sure if it's because I'm a senior and have had 3 years of college already or what, but I actually feel pretty smart in all of my classes, and really confident in my own intelligence. Normally I'm worried that what I'm going to say is wrong, or stupid, or I feel like basically everyone else in the class is smarter than me, and I don't feel like that at all this year. I feel at least equal in intelligence to everyone else, and I feel that what I have to say is intelligent and well thought out. It definitely makes for more enjoyable classes.

Did you think I was too stupid to know what a eugoogooly was?